when ur talking to ur crush & your bestfriend keeps bringing up embarrassing stories about you
i am kind of sad ok
this cat’s name is Princess Monster Truck
I have to laugh.
People constantly portray Hades in new age media as this totes evil bad guy, yet Zeus and Poseidon have fathered more monsters and people than he has and have raped women
while Hades is just there in the underworld with the one girl he kidnapped and agreed to let her free in the summer months with no children of his own, probably rolling his eyes and going ‘Guys, can we have a normal family dinner for once? Please?’
today at work someone tipped me a potato
in some countries that is a marriage proposal
Even the potato looks confused
it’s a metaphor
The best part is that the crab is the symbol for the zodiac sign Cancer, so in a way even the crab itself is a metaphor
Do you love the colors of Marvel?
parents making sex jokes
grandparents making sex jokes
nine-year-olds making sex jokes
Welcome to tumblr where we go from parents making sex jokes to sassy Hitler in 0.6 seconds
d’you think the avengers ever play a game where they try to push steve’s buttons and get him all riled up and patriotic?
tony casually throws it into a conversation like “oh yeah I don’t vote” and steve trails off mid-sentence and gapes for a second before he starts in on the importance of the democratic process and how dangerous it can be if citizens give up their say in how the government is run and tony is trying so so hard to keep a straight face
meanwhile bruce is standing in the background timing the speech with his watch because whoever gets the longest rant wins a little trophy that tony made. the current holder of the trophy is clint who managed to convince steve that he doesn’t pay taxes
my sister is doing an essay for her finance course about bitcoin and her introduction is basically defining currency and equal payments.
so i told her to add alchemy’s first law of equivalent exchange. she just sent me the essay to look over it and
she fucking did.
SHE GOT A FUCKING DISTINCTION FOR THIS ESSAY.