OH MY GOD MY HEART
HOW IS THIS NOT THE MOST POPULAR POST ON TUMBLR
That tongue bit tho
Of course it is.
ALL BITCHES THIS IS MY HOME TOWN TAKE A FUCKING SEAT WHILE I TELL YOU THIS STORY. GET A BOWL OF POPCORN BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS DOPE
IN THE 1940’S PORTLAND WAS PUTTING IN LAMPPOSTS AND FOR WHATEVER GOD DAMN REASON THIS ONE NEVER GOT FILLED.
IN 1946, DICK FAGAN, AN AMERICAN IRISHMAN WHO WROTE FOR THE OREGON JOURNAL, GOT BLOODY FUCKING BORED AT HIS JOB AND WOULD LOOK OUT HIS WINDOW ONTO THIS SAD EXCUSE FOR ROAD CONSTRUCTION HOLE. ONE DAY HE SAID “FUCK THIS”, PLANTED SOME FLOWERS, AND NAMED IT “MILL ENDS PARK” BECAUSE IT’S RIGHT AT THE END OS MILL STREET. BITCHES!
HE WROTE ABOUT THIS NEW FUCKING PARK AND SPOKE ABOUT HOW LEPRECHAUNS LIVED THERE AND SHIT. MOTHERFUCKING LEPRECHAUNS IN THE MIDDLE OF DOWNTOWN, WHAT THE SHIT.
HOLD ONTO TO THE EDGE OF YOUR SEATS BECAUSE THIS RIDE GETS EVEN BETTER. THIS PARK HOLDS A GUINNESS WORLD RECORD FOR BEING THE SMALLEST PARK WITH WITH INFORMATION SAYING “It was designated as a city park on 17 March 1948 at the behest of the city journalist Dick Fagan (USA) for snail races and as a colony for leprechauns”. MOTHER. FUCKING. SNAIL RACES. BITCHES.
IT’S EVEN BEEN PIMPED OUT OVER THE YEARS
HO HO HO MOTHERFUCKS WE CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS HERE
WE CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT.
THE BEST PART IS THAT IT EVEN HAD OCCUPY PORTLAND PROTESTERS
SO I HOPE YOU FUCKING LEARNED SOMETHING TODAY ABOUT TINY ASS PARKS.
I lost my shoe.
WHAT HAVE I FUCKING DONE
THIS IS THE 10 MILLIONTH TIME IVE SEEN THIS POST AND IM STILL LAUGHGIN
My day needed this!
star trek/treasure planet au god help me
I have never seen a comment on a post that is as true as this one.
D&D Stats Explained with Tomatoes
Strength is being able to crush a tomato.
Dexterity is being able to dodge a tomato.
Constitution is being able to eat a bad tomato.
Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is knowing not to put a tomato in a fruit salad.
Charisma is being able to sell a tomato based fruit salad.
#NO OKAY NO THIS POST MAKES ME SO SAD#BECAUSE ED USED TO BE RIGHT HANDED#AND THEN AFTER THE FAILED TRANSMUTATION AND AUTOMAIL SURGERY#HE HAD TO RELEARN HOW TO DO THINGS NOW WITH HIS LEFT HAND BEING DOMINANT#SO OF COURSE HIS ARTWORK IS SHIT#SO IS HIS HANDWRITING#BECAUSE HE HAS ONLY HAD THAT ARM FOR FOUR YEARS#HE HAS THE ART/WRITING ABILITY OF A FOUR YEAR OLD#*SOBBING FOREVER AT THE SMALL DETAILS AT FMA* (ruinsofxerxes)